The Proofs

I just recieved my proofs back from my graduation. I narrowed it down to five pictures. Now I have to narrow it down to two. Which two do you like?

What do you think?

My niece just called me to go on the web to see her friend's web site sorryassbabydaddies.com. The site is supposed to be a forum for female single parents who are not getting child support to put their children's fathers on blast. I went through her site (misspellings and grammatical errors in all)and left with mixed feelings. First, there is a lot of drama because she posted her children's pictures on the site and people feel like she is exploiting them. Her reasoning is that when the news media and talk shows show children, aren't they exploiting them too or is that just business? Secondly her site is poorly edited and managed - not all her fault. Lastly, people ask what is the point? As a single parent I have to 90 percent agree. That kind of anger does not have a place in your home. How can you give your children all of your love,when you are filled with so much anger? It is not good for your physical or mental well-being. The other ten percent of me agrees that absent parents need to be held accountable. So many single parents (male and female) are struggling to give their children a better life than they had. A bigger issues is raising our daughters and sons to become parents by choice not by chance. Children do not come with instructions and parenthood is not something you should get into lightly. Now I agree for a lot of us single parents, our intent is for happily ever after - I know it was mine. I loved my children's father and I find comfort in the fact that they were born from that love. Yes, I wish things would have turned out differently but I know the only way to give my children a fair chance in life is to put away that negativity and be the best I can be. What do you think?

Alls well that ends well

Okay so much for my two day break. My dear bf has returned tonight (by the way he hates computers so he'll never read my blog :). We have an evening of pizza planned (I am having a salad instead) and checking out some movies. I am going to try to rent 16 Blocks and Freedomland, I've heard both of them were good movies. Maybe I'll stop and get my favorite Margarita mix too

Back to the salad thing, we have a cafeteria with a salad bar at work and it is the bomb. Today was my first time trying it, but it was great. Everything was fresh and there are at least eight dressings to choose from. It only costs 39 cents every 4 ounces and it was totally filling. I have been taking baby steps to a better me. I am eating more salads, veggies and fresh fruit, less meat, and drinking lots and lots of water. I truly have to work on my exercise regimen next. Right now I am focusing on walking more. I have gotten so use to jumping in my car just to go to the store three blocks away. I have also given up taking the elevator at work all the time (especially since I have gotten stuck twice in the elevator in the past month). Mentally, I am shopping for books - (any suggestions?) and I am renewing my subscription to Essence - how did I let it lapse? I also have to take the GMATs this summer so I can apply for grad school in January 2007.

It is funny how in our twenties we feel invincible and in our thirties we start appreciating our bodies more so we can make it through the forties, fifties, sixties, etc

Twice as nice

Two posts in one day! Here are a couple of layouts I managed to complete the past few weeks. This is my daughter on Easter. She is growing up so nicely, and she loves the camera.

She is also getting into photography. She wants to do a photo shoot of me – cool! I kept this simple - used wild asparagus double-sided paper, kraft paper and cut the hearts with my sizzilit dies. I cut the chipboard letters with my coluzzle - it can’t go all the way through the chipboard, but it gives me a guide to cut the letters by hand.

The next layout is of my niece and grand-nephew (her son). He started little league baseball this year; he has so much energy she has to keep him involved in sports. Maybe he’ll make All-American one year. I didn’t do anything special for this layout, I played with circles which was cool and I used my trusty but dusty hole punch to add a different visual element, three bugs in a rug paper.

This last layout is my favorite. I love the edgy look of the Cherry Arte paper so I used foam stamps for the word “urban”, brushed the edges with a dollar store toothbrush and doodled around it with white paint.
The chipboard scroll work is from fancy pants and I painted it gray and green to highlight some of the colors in the paper. The word “diva” is painted chipboard letters from Gin X. Then I added a black ribbon border. It definitely has the look I was going for.TFL.

I am now working on an album from the race for the cure. I wanted to incorporate a poem into it, but the first one to come to mind is Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou and although that is definitely on my list of favorite poems, it is so overdone. So if you know of any poems about women or sisterhood, let me know.

Missing you

I really miss blogging. I have had some changes in my life and I am trying to adapt. First, I can’t check anyone’s blog while I am at work. Due to security reasons, we are blocked from all blogging sites. That really sucks, since I rarely take an “official” lunch break (I rather use that time cyber surfing). So now I have to use the internet when I get home, which has become especially challenging. Since my bf had a stroke, we have been trying to tackle the hurdle of living together. Now to some of you it may seem strange that this is a challenge for me, but I have never lived with a man. I have lived with my sisters a couple times over the past seventeen years but for the most part I have been on my own. I have been a single parent for twelve years and I admit I like being in charge of my own space.

For some it is not that difficult, but for me just the small things (like using my cookie sheet to cook salmon, uuuuuugh!!) that simply drive me through the roof. The other thing is my bf is a homebody and that is good I guess, but then he wants me to spend every moment at home talking to him and watching the scifi channel. Now I know some of you are saying, “What is wrong with a little attention?” Well, I can’t get anything else done – No scrapping, no talking on the phone, no cleaning, no reading, no me time. I have been really trying not to complain because I don’t want him to take it the wrong way and I figure once we get use to sharing our space he will back off a little. So I sneak on the internet – I read your blogs on the way to the bathroom or kitchen or on the sly when I am vacuuming. I sneak and do layouts when he is at the barbershop and I love when he comes home late because I can clean up my scrap area. I feel so deceptive, but I do have a life outside of him, what to do????? Today I am free because he is angry with me and went back to his house (dare I say wooohooo?) So I am trying to catch up, post and comment on everyone’s blog. Here is a picture of us from my graduation. He doesn’t look spoiled does he? But we all know looks can be deceiving.

Being Appreciative

I have spent the past four days really appreciating life. I had a family emergency that was not as bad as it could have been, but it was definitely life changing for someone close to me. We take so many everyday things for granted, something as simple as being able to type this entry, but I encourage everyone to stop and be thankful for today for nothing is promised tomorrow.
On another note I finally finished my layout I started last week at the make it unforgettable crop. Stephanie will see that I went a totally different direction with it, but I think it turned out well. I am trying to pick up the pace with my scrapping but it is hard with work and the family. Anyway this is a short post, I hope everyone has a great holiday weekend and enjoy it to the fullest.

Living my Life like it's Golden

I had a great weekend. It started off with a graduation for a distance cousin. It was a great way to unwind after work on a Friday night. My daughters also got the chance to play with some second cousins their age, they had so much fun they didn't want to go home. Saturday we went to the Mother/Daughter luncheon for Girl Scouts. We had a light lunch and laughed a lot. I enjoyed their company. Then I dropped them off for some "me" time at the Sistahs in Scrapbooking crop at Make it Unforgettable. It was my first time at the store and WOW! It was more than I expected. The most embarrassing thing was that I have so many of those products already - I definitely have to stop spending!!!!! The best thing was socializing with my blogging buddies who I feel like I know already. We took a picture that Lisa, Stephanie and Toya have on their blogs and when I saw it kind of made me feel like I was in a sorority - Mi Phi Scrap, LOL. I felt like all of us are talented ladies with a common bond, outside of my usual circle of friends and it was great. Now I just have to meet Adrienne to make it complete.

Moms don't have to be Superwomen

I hope everyone had a great Mother's day. I reflected a lot on my life and what example I am trying to set for my daughters. A lot of this reflection occurred during the Race for A Cure - Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer walk. I made shirts with my Mom's picture on it because my sisters, nieces, and daughters walk in her memory. It was a hard moment for me and I was glad to keep it together, (my daughters hate to see me cry). So anyway, I was walking and thinking, looking at my daughters and remembering the first time I held them and how much they have grown and I started to think about why scrapping is so important to me. I look at pictures of my mother and search for memories. Most of them are of our relationship not of her as a person. I wonder what she felt as a woman? I wonder if she was happy? What made her happy? What were her goals? What was her wildest moment? Who was her first love? How important was love to her? What would she do differently if she had the chance? Was her life fulfilled? How did she feel when she was first diagnosed? Who did she tell? Who was her favorite group? What were her dreams? So many questions I have for her - see she passed when I was still young so to me she was only MOM, not the strong black woman I now know her to be who overcame so many obstacles. So through the questions I realize that I want these answers left for my daughters. I want them to know that I am who they are going to be someday. That I have feelings and dreams just like they do. I don't want them to think I am perfect. And I don't want them to think I can fix everything. I do want them to know I will try my best to love and provide for them any way possible, but I too may fall short. I don't want to be their Superwoman, just know me as a woman who is a MOM.

Happy National Scrapbooking Day!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited. Not only is tomorrow National Scrapbooking day, but I have the whole house to myself until Sunday. My daughters are away and my boyfriend is being supportive by staying home. There is so much going on. Almost every site has giveaways, free downloads and contests. A Cherry on Top is having an online crop and free online classes. Tiare is doing giveaways and sales at Classy Coordinates.
I personally have so many things I want to complete. I have an order for 25 graduation invitations and I wanted to start the invites for my oldest sister's 50th birthday. I am determined to complete a mini album, and some clipboards. I also want to start end of the year teacher gifts for my daughters' wonderful teachers!!!! So much to do in such a little time.
I hope everyone is enjoying this special holiday for us special people, TTFN - ta ta for now (You have to be a tigger fan to appreciate it)

Gone but not forgotten

I haven't posted in a while because I am adjusting to my new schedule. It is hard to find time to post or blog because since I am new I have to be on my best behavior and I can't do it at work :), . Since I am 100% not a morning person, by the time I get home I am ready for bed. So now I am in week two, and I am feeling a little better. I took the time out to scrap this weekend and I have a ton of projects I want to start. I have done some self discovery over the past few weeks like -
* I am buying the Cricut. I saw a demonstration on QVC and since I only have a few sizzlits and no other die cutting system, I think it is worth $250.
* I could win an award for the slowest scrapper in the world. The only consulation is that when an idea does come to me then it flows easily.
* I need two scrapping styles, one to get projects done and another to stretch my
creativity.
* I absolutely have to start taking pictures of myself, I have so few that the only BOM I could do is a BOM talking about the pictures I don't have of myself.
* I have reached a purchasing plateau, I went to AC Moore and only bought adhesives and cardstock. Definitely time to focus on creating.
So here is the layout I completed this weekend and I hope to get more done this week. Just in case, you don't hear from me until the weekend Have a great week!!!!!

Time Out

Since I am changing jobs, I decided to take this week off and I have been more busy than I anticipated. Mostly with Spring cleaning, redecorating, etc. I have been blog surfing and it seems like there is a lot of discussion around why we scrap. Things are definitely changing in the industry. I think part of the frustration or competitiveness comes from the fact that all of us are such talented ladies that we look at the HOFamers and in the magazines, knowing that our pages are deserving of the same kind of glory. I try hard not to get caught up in what will other people think (although we all love praise). But a positive comment from a fellow scrapper is meaningful because it comes from someone who understands the craft and the industry. So how do we stay focused? I once heard the Reverend T.D. Jakes say that we should treat each aspect of our lives like a business, including a mission statement. So my scrapbooking mission statement is "To document and preserve the memories of my life as the story is being told in a creative and artistic manner for all to follow and appreciate for many years to come, leaving an indication of who I am in the creation of each page for future generations of my family. "

I'm Walking on Sunshine

And don't it feel good? I am in such a positive place right now, and it feels so good. A few months ago, I received a chain letter email quoting the Reverend T.D. Jakes as saying "don't cry or worry about things that go away, stop chasing them. That means that part of your life is over". This has affected me in so many different ways, I go through life with very few stressors, it is just not worth it. So now my blessings have been pouring in. I picked up my degree from school Wooohooo! I got a new job, double Wooohoo! I had parent/teacher conferences and both of my daughters are doing very well in school, triple Wooohooo! And lastly, I have been scrapping. I know it seems like I do so many layouts of my oldest daughter, but she is such a "ham" that I have a ton of pictures of her. The picture in the layout of both of them is old but I remember that day well. I think it was the hottest day of the summer and Jada (my youngest) was not in the mood to have her pictures taken, so this smirk was the best we could do. I used several transparencies for this layout and I think it came out great. When I thought about them having Levi outfits on, I realized in years to come, they may not even remember that Levi was a brand name, so I really wanted to document a little about Levi's and incorporate it in the title, like a piece of history. Now if I can find my old Sergio Valente's I will really be digging up the past, unfortunately I doubt if they would still fit!

Not feeling it....

There have been so many things going on I that I have not felt like posting. Not because I haven't thought about it or even really wanted to but because I just was not feeling like my normal self. A lot of it has to do with trying to figure out and deal with my relationship with my boyfriend. Some days he makes me really glad that I am technically single. On the flip side some days he makes me feel like being single for the rest of my life is my fate, and to be honest I don't know if that would be such a bad thing. Then there my career choices, educational goals, parenting goals and parenting situations. Not to mention choosing what to watch on TV tonight :). Just joking, but it does seem at times that every small decision turns into a monumental decision. But blogging definitely help me out of those ruts. I look forward to checking up on everyone and letting you know what is going on with me, so thanks you guys.
I have managed to complete one layout. I am too embarrassed to tell you how long I have been working on this page. Sorry for the bad scan but the background should be all one color. The paper is from imagination project. I used foam stamps for the word FAME and added clear embossing powder for a glossy look. I used my coluzzle for the star/flower looking embellishments around the picture. I like the concept of the coluzzle but once you put a few nicks in the template it gets hard to work with. Overall I do like it.
Also here is picture for Tiffany. She posted one of her daughter some time ago I told her I had a similar picture of my daughter. The funny thing is my picture was taken twelve years ago. Doesn't it look similar Tiffany? Now to scrap it.

Funny Story

As much as I preach to my children about not worrying about what other people say I do it all of the time. I showed my co-worker my blog today and she looked at my profile picture and said. "Who is that your mother?" Now, I loved my other picture because I though it looked a little classic and my complexion looked true to life. Even still I felt the need to change the picture, because let's face it I don't want to look older. I converted it to black and white because the background was so busy. When I take another one I like I will probably change it again.

Is there something in the water?

We had such beautiful weather this weekend, that I took my girls to the park for a few pictures. This is one of my twelve year old daughter - twelve?????? Oh my goodness what is in the food? I did not look anything like this when I was twelve or am I being paranoid? She has hips and everything, what happened to my baby? Even though she looks older she has the personality of a twelve year old and does not give me an ounce of trouble. She does everything I ask her to do and does not complain. She talks to me and tells me when she thinks I am wrong in a very respectful manner. She is definitely my pride and joy (her sister too, but it's something about the first). I wish she would have had the chance to meet my mom. My mother would have spoiled her to death. She has a gap in her front teeth like my mother (she hates it, I love it) - I see my mother in her everytime I look at her. I am blessed.

Sales and stuff

I got two Michael's ads this week in my Sunday paper and guess what? They now have American Crafts Ribbons . So I went to my local store, armed with two 40% off coupons. The ribbon is only $5.99 regular price and with the coupon my total came to 3.59 a pack. If you are into ribbon you will love them. They are soo pretty in person. I wanted to buy the whole line. Of course they wouldn't let me use two coupons in one visit, so my plan is to take my daughters back with me and use three coupons (I have some from A.C. Moore too). Adrienne says they may be phasing out the coupons - I hope it isn't so. I just got use to having them e-mailed to me instead of looking for them in the newspaper. Speaking of .Adrienne, she now has me excited about
scrapetc's online store's grand opening. Check it out, they are having fun grand opening contests and great prizes

I don't do shout outs but if I did..........

I don't know how many people listen to or even get the Tom Joyner morning radio show from 6:00 a.m. until 10:00 a.m. Monday -Friday but he does a segment where you can shout out people even though they swear they don't do shouts outs. So since I have been MIA I want to shout out everyone to let you know I have been lurking but not really able to post.

First a big shout out to Adrienne who set her mind to getting her scrapping room together and did her grand reveal today. Love it A - you are too much.

Next I have to holler at Stephanie who is starting a big project. You must be reading my mind because I am determined to complete my first full album this month too.

Hey there Tiffany!! Congrats on your graduation! What is it your Master's or Doctorate? I am graduating in June with my bachelor's. My daughters are so proud and now that I have received my student loan bill, I will be registering for a Master's program very soon :).

Shout out to Dana - love your posts, you are so real. You and I have a lot in common and I look forward to reading your blog.

Big shout out to Toya. You offer such great ideas and share your true love of scrapbooking, you keep me focused on the real reasons I scrap.

I can't forget Lisa who is laid back but extremely talented and 100% supportive. Can't wait to see you again at the next crop. What should I bring?

And last but not least there is Bonzairn's blog that is just full of inspiration both creatively and spiritually. I love your work and your positive nature.

I hope I didn't forget anyone but if I did please know I have mad props and respect for all of the talented scrappers out there. I hope everyone has a great weekend, we are having great weather in the Northeast so whatever I do it will be outside.
Later!

I am having a question mark instead of a period

I absolutely, positively hate, "the curse", "My visitor", "Mary" or any other code word,covert name for "that time of month". I have the misfortune to be a member of the symptom-of-the-month club. One month I have swelling - it doesn't matter what (feet, hands, legs, attitude, etc). Another time is was a hand rash - go figure. Another month it was bloating. Another month I have breast tenderness (okay TMI). Then one month to my surprise it was nothing, thank God I count the days and go to the bathroom often. This month I am overly emotional, nauseous and have a bad attitude. If I roll my eyes any harder they really may fall out of my head like my mother use to say. My question mark during this yucky period is - why don't men go through something just as awful every month? And my other question is - Where is the off switch? I love my children and know I am blessed to have them but my baby factory is closed, shut down for business, finito - so why can't I just turn it off?

Where does the time go?

I can't believe that it is Sunday night already. I have spent this weekend food shopping, cooking and cleaning and no scrapping. Part of that is because of the way I food shop. I have to hit about four-five stores just to get everything I want. I have one place for meats, another for vegetables, another for household goods, and another for pantry items. Then of course I have to hit the dollar store for those "special" deals. So it becomes an all day event. The good thing is that I end up spending only about $150 to $175 dollars for the month for the three of us. That's not bad, huh. Tiffany has gotten me hooked on the sweet and salty granola bars. The almond version is just too good, and they are priced just right at Walmart.
Now I have to do my daughters hair for her trip to The Franklin Institute tomorrow. I got bumped as a chaperone because of limited space, so I want to make sure she is well prepared.
On another note, I am really bummed out about not being able to do any scrapping this weekend. I can't say that I've lost my mojo, I just keep letting life's daily struggles and turmoil get in my way. There are at least two challenges on A Cherry on Top that I want to complete by Tuesday and one that I have until March 15 to tackle. So let me wash dishes, do hair, iron clothes, vaccum for the night and oh yeah scrapbook. Talk to you later.

Cutter Shopping

Okay, I am in serious need of a cutting system. I have a Sizzlit die cutter that works great. I never invested in a Sizzix just because it seemed so expensive buying different dies and fonts. Just as I was going to breakdown and buy a Sizzix the electronic cutters started to come out. So I have been looking at the options. I like the wishblade. I actually love the wishblade. The biggest attraction is that it is compatible with any true type font. The drawbacks are that it has be hooked up to the computer and it seems like there is a learning curve and oh yeah, the price. But I found a web site The Scrappin Path that will allow you to put it on layaway and its is even on sale for $439.00. But then on the other hand there is the cricut. This is too cute. It looks easy to use and it is portable. The price tag is $299.00 (I found a site that had pre-orders for $269.00)which isn't that bad. The drawback is that you have to purchase cartridges to get different fonts at $89.00 a cartridge. That can really add up. So now I am wondering am I being too frugal especially since right now I am hand cutting letters and some of my images. Or is the market going to change and these machines are going to be on sale at ridiculously low prices and I'll regret not holding out a little longer. I did make one major decision however - after I purchase a cutter, then I am on scrap book shopping hiatus. I am going to limit my purchases to cardstock necessities and my monthly kit until I reach my goal of completing several albums. I have found myself becoming a collector instead of a creator and I don't like it. Maybe I will hold off my purchases until the CK in Valley Forge this summer, that will make the experience more exciting.